seasons of change

i felt much the same when during the transition from high school to college. i didn't even want to apply to college anywhere. i spent most of my time hiding in my room over the summer. granted, this was before i was on anti-depressants, which might have made a difference. i've never been one for enjoying change. i'm 27 years old now and just looking for a new job has been a great achievement for me. it's easy to stay in a safe, familiar place and get into a nice cozy rut. doing something about it creates risk, something i'm afraid of, moreso than most people.

i understand what you mean about being ready to close this chapter in your life, but at the same time, mourning it. memories and repetition and rhythm grow as comforting as surroundings. not only will you be leaving the city, but you'll also have to relearn schedules and make new memories and meet new people. this can also be exciting and refreshing.